So I wrote a new parody song today during lunch. I was inspired by the story of having my car stolen, and what better genre to do than Emo? And what better Emo band to pick on than Dashboard Confessional? So, here goes, …

Thanks to my awesome Mac and Photo Booth, I can now see that, yes, I am officially balding. Or at least thinning. In honor of this impending doom, I hereby make two promises: 1. I will never, ever try to hide the proble…